My Cheeky Chickies

A long time coming!

2010-03-31T19:02:00.007+11:00

Yes, I know it has been way too long since I posted.

So, what has been happening?

Me:

well i am still working two days a week with adolescents through our local Youth Mental Health Team. I am enjoying the work and we have been pretty busy. Plus we are piloting a new group program, and it is giving me some new skills too.

My business is coming along. Last year I changed from being an online retail store, to designing and manufacturing my own children's clothing label. Big change, and continued improvements have been made over the year. We have increased our size range, added new styles, and have just taken delivery of three new custom fabric colours. I have been receiving a lot of positive exposure in the national kids magazines, with a number of our garments being photographed and used in fashion shoots, and in one magazine I was even interviewed for a "Meet the Designer" feature - that was such a massive compliment. I have just closed down the online store component of my website, and am now focusing on wholesale - trying to get my label in to boutique retail stores around Australia - and the world some day too! Always many bumps in the road, but so much fun and satisfaction and pride.

Anyway, never a dull moment when you run your own business.

Nate:

Nate was offered a new job before Christmas and commenced at the beginning of February. It is a completely different position for him, as a sales rep, but in the same industry (audio hi-fi equipment). He is really enjoying the new job, and working with a few of his good mates. He is having to travel a fair bit through, as his territory stretches far and wide, and he is away overnight, and even up to three nights at a time. He was supposed to be given a car, but he has had to wait for the start of the new FTB year (next week). Typically, our little car that we purchased just last year (second hand) and that had low mileage and in great condition, has now had to drive all over NSW, and now, as we are getting ready to sell it, we have found out through a service check, that the brakes and the gear box have gone! Anyways, that's life isn't it! Nate really loves his new job though, and this week they have their annual conference - four days being put up in a plush hotel at Manly by the beach, dinners out, "team building" activities, and of course, work stuff - yeah right. So we have spent the weekend shopping for new clothes so he looks schmick when he heads out on the town with the boys :)

Amalia:

now 4 years old and such a strong personality. Mum (and those of her friends who have known me my life) laugh and say she is exactly as i was - karma. She really is adorable most of the time. Loves singing, and really getting in to barbie dolls now, all that pretend play, its so funny. lately, she has been asking me to act out Snow White with her, she hands me a pretend apple, I take a bite and faint, then she does a wicked which laugh. In tonight's version, Tae played the prince and gave me the kiss to bring me back to life :) Mali has been doing more and more modelling for my range, and i might be biased, but she is just getting more and more beautiful - she's a real little girl now. We recently had a profile photograph session, for a magazine that is doing a feature on me (yes, another one - hheee heee - getting popular) - in the photo, Mali just steals the attention immediately - hoping to get some copies to post. Next year Mali starts BIG school, so she will be starting preparations and readiness for school program at kindy shortly - very exciting indeed.

Taelan:

So the little man has really been well. We are so thankful daily, that he continues to show growth and development, albeit a little slower than normal. But health wise he really is great. He had grommets inserted a few months back - though speech still very limited - we get baby babble, and mumm mummm mumm, and have been working hard to get him saying dadd dadd. He has been cruising along the furniture for some time now, has mastered climbing up and down stairs, can actually take himself right up the play equipment and turns himself around to slide backwards down the slippery slide :) sooooo cute -everyone at the park always comments on how impressive it is! He has been walking along behind his push along toy, and enjoys it greatly, but has no confidence to walk freely - or even holding hands. Some day soon. We laughed yesterday, when out at lunch with a friends very fast and active toddler - although we wish Tae could walk himself, before long we will be running after him - we know!

Tae recently underwent surgery to clear his blocked tear ducts, but unfortunately it didn't work, and we now have a referral to a tear duct specialist, who may possibly recommend inserting a stent in to his tear ducts to keep them open.

Aside from this, his physical health is really good. Our physiotherapy, speech therapy and occupational therapy has now all been reduced to quarterly meetings at the review clinic - and his day care has received extra funding to provide additional support services - so things all seem to be well taken care of.

Tae too has started modelling for Cheeky Chickies - such a cutie with his big front teeth :)

Anyways, hope you are all well. seeing as I don't get here often, would love for you to follow my other blog http://www.freerangeclothing.blogspot.com/ and see the shenanigans we generally get up to :)

Our Little Drummer Boy

2009-11-11T07:14:00.004+11:00

Tae got this for his birthday, and you can tell he just loves playing with it!

what a laugh!

2009-10-11T21:07:00.004+11:00

Happy Birthday Little Man!

2009-08-05T17:40:00.005+10:00

Happy First Birthday Tae!!

We love you sooooooooo much and

you have brought so much joy to our family over the past 12 months

My birthday outfit - including my new red shoes from Aunty Lolly

Love My Daddy!

Can I have some of your icecream Mali???!!!!

yum yum!

My Aunty Lolly....

My Poppy......

My Granny :)

Yes, I know, I am very cheeky!!

my little dancing queen

2009-07-11T21:38:00.003+10:00

My little man on the move

2009-07-08T22:08:00.008+10:00

Where have we been?

2009-07-08T11:13:00.004+10:00

Yes, well it would seem that we had fallen off the face of the earth - my very good friend Dayna said to me the other day "when are you going to post on your blog - i am so sick of seeing those paryt photos!"

I have been really busy and neglected my little journal here - I would like to say it is because business has been so flat out - but alas - it is just life!

so how many months has it been? two months? slacko!

well, business has been good. I launched my Cheeky Chickies Free Range Clothing at the beginning of April - we know that the economy isn't great to support massive sales at present, but I have been getting more and more new customers and some fantastic feedback. We have been reviewed on a couple of blogs too. I am really gearing up for a big spring/summer launch in August, and will have advertising in some of our great kids fashion magazines out here. i have been sewing a lot of my own stuff - yes, that's right - i bought a sewing machine in April and taught myself to sew - and now, I am about to invest in an overlocker, and much to my parent's delight, I am about to take over their spare bedroom (my sis's old room) and set up a sewing studio :)

if you are interested in checking out where i am up to with Cheeky Chickies, my website is http://www.cheekychickies.com.au/ and the blog is http://www.freerangeclothing.blogspot.com/

ooh, and also, you must check out http://www.carissalittlephotography.blogspot.com/ She has a couple of pics from our spring/summer photo shoot - i am just awaiting the disc with all my pics, but this will give you a little taste of what's to come :)

Ok, moving on, our family. Well, the kids are great really. Mali being 3 now has really little girl attitude. So much so that I had to meet with her focus teacher at kindy and set up a behaviour management plan and rewards book. The teacher explained that Mali ignores their instructions, defiantely says "no, I don't want to" (move over to where i can actually see the pages of the book you are reading) and the teacher was horrified when Mali called out to her during rest time "Come and pat me bum bum head!" hhhhmmmmm not sure where she gets that attitude. She does try it on at home, but doesn't get away with much, we do have some major mexican stand offs and she has a thing about screaming. Typical that the adolescent psychologist has to start dealing with challenging behaviour in her own child at the age of 3!

Tae is doing really well. We, touch wood, have not been struck by any really nasty sickness so far this winter, our eating habits have improved greatly - although we still prefer to eat pureed food, but will tolerate some chunkier stuff from time to time. Our sitting has greatly improved, I can now put him in a sitting position and leave him. he will either stay sitting (though tends to place his hands on his ankles to hold himself up, rather than further up his leg where his back would be straighter up and down), and then he can now move himself from sitting, on to his tummy.

Tae is now crawling - well, in a caterpiller/commando like motion, but manages to get himself where ever he wants, and Mali is having a ball "Tae Tae, come under here, under the table..... Tae Tae, come up here to the bedroom".... its really great to watch, and Mali is really fantastic with Tae, that is her redeaming quality at the moment (oh, that and her rendition of "The sun will come out - tomorrow" from Annie).

I am busy busy busy - nothing unusual there - two days of work at the hospital - I am settled in now and happy enough to be back there - working with some interesting clients - far more challenging than previous - have a lot of kids struggling with severe anxiety, and having to go to their homes cause they aren't able to leave.... its really interesting, and I am doing two days training this week on working with young people with anxiety - so looking forward to brushing up on some skills :)

I have tae at home with me on wednesdays, and this is really my day where i try to get as much done as possible, and end up spending half the day on the computer reading blogs, working on my websites and social networking for CC. As i said earlier, I am now sewing, so trying to spend more time on that. Part of setting up the studio at mums house means that I have a space i go to and work, then i can leave it and come home - and not mixing the too - found that more stressful before, when i was moving my sewing machine to and from the dining table, then getting fabric out to cut, all whilst Mali was climbing on the dining table trying to watch me sew and play etc etc

A bit of a down side on the family has been Nate's work. In mid April, his boss announced that they had to close the store at the end of the month, and paid everyone out. As they were getting some good sales, he decided the keep the store open, and put them on to casual. They were paying them all over the shop - fortnightly to begin with, then a week late, then they said it would be weekly, but it didn't go in, and the guys were having to chase pays. Initially Nate was told that they would like him to work at their Drummoyne store, and had him over a few times working, but a fortnight ago, he was told out of the blue, that this was not going to happen now, and MAYBE they could have him at the Leichardt store. This was the same day that the boss came and took the Nate's work car leaving him with nothing to drive. They had said they would give him a work van (which wasn't going to any good for driving our kids around), but now have said that they can't give him the van. Last week, his store closed down, and this week, they had Nate start at the Leichardt store. This store is approximately an hour's drive, with no direct public transport route. So, it has been a great challenge for Nate to get to work. He borrowed mums car for two days, and today and tomorrow, has the lend of our friend's car. We are looking at cars for sale - but it is hard to jump in to something like that, and find the money for it too... especially when he is still only a casual :( A bit of extra running around for me, as I am not able to share the movements of the kids to and from day care etc, plus I was very lucky to have Nate always cook dinner at home before, but now as he doesn't get home til about 6.45pm, I am cooking now too.

BUT I don't want to sound like a whinger - we all have our health, the kids are fantastic, and we having loving family and friends around us. As much as there is stress - and there will ALWAYS be something to stress about in life - I am excited about new adventures ahead :)

Anyway, will finish with a pic to make you smile and will post on Mali's dance concert next :)

Fairies, jumping castles and icecream

2009-04-08T09:19:00.003+10:00

So, after Tae's Baptism, we headed back to our place where we had set up a fairy wonderland in our backyard. I was so flat out the entire time, that i didn't get to take photos myself (thank you to my sister who did it for me) but unfortunately we didn't get one of the decorations in the garden - rainbow coloured balinese garden flags, coloured butterlfies attached to plants and rainbow coloured flower windmills in the ground. One thing that we could not help getting photos of, the piece de resistance, the Hot Pink Fairy Princess Jumping Caslte with slide!!

Needless to say that a fantastic day was had by all. The weather was brill and ALL the food went (Nate and I didn't even get one single lollie, piece of fairy bread, or a spoonfull of ice cream cake!)

I'm still not completely over the last week. It has been so massive. After sunday, i put myself to bed around 9ish, so I could try and get a tad bit of sleep, but was up at 4am monday morning, sewing for the mini fashion parade we ran at our local mums and bubs expo. It was our first public presentation of Cheeky Chickies Free Range Clothing and we had a fantastic response! You can check out some pics on our blog http://www.freerangeclothing.blogspot.com/ and our webstore is now open http://www.cheekychickies.com.au/

So here are some pics from the party. My sister bought Mali's outfit for her as a birthday gift!

about our little man

2009-04-08T08:43:00.003+10:00

So we had our trip in to Sydney Children's Hospital. Little man and his mummy. Firstly we had our follow up sleep clinic. The long and short of it - I didn't get much sleep. Little man was not impessed at all this time round, to have all the wires attached and tubes up in to his nose - it took about an hour (whilst my dinner sat on the table) for me to settle him off to sleep, he was very restless throughout the night, and then i had to get him up at 3am and try to give him some watered down apple juice (something he has never had before) as he was to then fast for his surgery that day. Then of course, the day started at 5.30am, as I got him up to give him a bath and wash all the plaster and stickers off before heading down for his surgery at 7am.

Could not believe how many mums and kids were waiting to be admitted for day surgery at 7am, it was pretty manic. Here I am pushing Tae in the pram, carrying my not so small overnight bag over my shoulder, and balancing my work bag full of all my craft stuff for Cheeky Chickies, on top of the pram, maneuvering through all the kids and parents. Luckily we were first cab off the rank, as I was so shattered, and had not had any breakfast or coffee! I was trying to remain calm as I was dressed in a cap and white gown, but when it came time to walk in with Tae to anesthetics, there was so much cuffufle over my luggage and pram, that they ended up saying, "he's happy now, why don't you just say goodbye here" boohoo :( There was comradare in the waiting room, and not so good coffee, but Tae was out again in about half an hour. A little grumpy man, but oh such a happy mummy to have him back in my arms! The ENT came by soon after with a smile on his face. No major obstructions detected. Adnoids and tonsils looked fine and he does not have tracheomelecia. He does have laryngeomelecia (not sure of spelling?) which is a floppy voice box, and this is what is causing his noisy breathing. Doc not concerned with this, usually fixes itself by the time kids are 2years of age. His oesaphageous was open, and reflux was visible, so need to stick to medication regime. All in all, don't need to go back to the ENT til after his hearing test, and that isn't for a while as they have a waiting list for that.

So all good! Another sleepless night though, as Tae was required to stay in overnight to observe his recovery after the general aneasthetic. My bed this night was a vinyl recliner chair in a room with three babies. Tae had another restless night, at 2am he was and vomitted, became very snotty and congested then had a temp of 38.2degrees.

So friday and saturday are a bit of blur, as I operated in robot mode, getting everything ready for the BIG EVENT!

And Sunday it was. 11.30am we attended St. Andrews Church Cronulla for Tae's Baptism. Tae wore a beautiful vintage gown, handed down from Nathan's grandfather, so not far off 100years of age! Here's a snapshot.

You will just have to get over it Den!

2009-03-25T09:53:00.003+11:00

Everybody at work has been fantastic and I have received the warmest welcome back. It was really tough for the first two weeks, but it got to the point where I caught myself - sounding like a broken record - repeating the same sob story about how unhappy I was having to go back to work two days a week, that it just wasn't in my headspace, and bla bla bla. At this particular moment, I think I had told the same story about 8 or 9 times, and this little voice inside said, "come on girl.... this is getting boring.... you are just going to have to get over it and move forward!"

So, I have come to an acceptance now. I would still prefer to be not having to go in to work, but I am getting on with things, and feeling not so overwhelmed.

Having said that, we have a massive couple of weeks ahead. Today is my father's 60th brithday - Happy Birthday Dad! And on saturday night we are having a big party for him. Mum is hosting it, but I need to do whatever I can to help her out, as she does tend to overwhelm herself - way more than me - and can succumb to her anxieties. Nate is usually off on Fridays, as he works on Saturdays, but this week he has been told they need him on due to staffing issues. So I will have the kiddies, whilst trying to sort out what I need to sort out, and at the same time, help mum get ready for the party.

My new clothing order for Cheeky Chickies is finally getting made up - I had some issues with the manufacturers and had to put the hard word on (or sob story really) as I have been adertising that the website will launch on 1st April, and we are booked in to do a Mums and Bubs Expo on 6th April - with a mini fashion parade. They have assured me I will have the product for the expo - really though, I need it way before, as I am doing all the applique, and need to have time to sew it (not that I have much time to sew anyways). But it should all work out. I have been getting some fantastic feedback, so hopefully it will all take off, when it is finally up and running.

So, on top of this, I have to spend two nights in at Sydney Children's Hospital with Tae next week. Wednesday night we have a follow up sleep study. At the last one in December, they found that Tae had some sleep apnoea, so the doc wants to see if it has improved or is any worse. The following day we are booked in for an LBO. This is a larynoscopy, bronchoscopy, and eosophagoscopy (not sure if the spelling is all correct). We had our first visit with the Ear Nose and Throat (ENT) specialist a couple of week's back. I informed him of our paediatrician's thoughts that Tae might have enlarged adnoids and/or tonsils, and this might be causing the sleep apnoea, and also showed him x-rays from our recent Barium Swallow (second one). The ENT reported that there was no indication that Tae had enlarged adnoids/tonsils, and that he believed that the obstruction was further down. He was quite concerned with Tae's noisy breathing (referred to in his letter to the doc as "intermittnet stridor") and the implications of Trachea Melecia, as noted by the doctor who did the x-ray. This is a floppy windpipe. ENT said that we need to do the LBO to investigate these issues, and he also stated concern that Tae may have silent reflux and possibly aspirating the acids, which can cause long term bronchial damage. I asked him what the implications were regarding the trachea melecia, if its not diagnoses and left untreated, and he said that kids have died as a result. Now, not to be all melodramatic, as from our (internet) readins, majority of cases fix themselves as the child grows and the body becomes stonger. But answers are always good. The surgery is purely investigative in nature, where they put a little camera down and check out what is going on, however he is required to go under general anaesthetic, and because he is so young and small, ENT wants to keep him in overnight to make sure he has the best recovery.

So, we are in wednesday night and thursday night. Nate will pic us up on the friday morning, and then we have a busy day of shopping for the BIG event on Sunday 5th April. Yes, timing is perfect, we are having Tae baptised in the morning, then following up with celebrations at our house, where we have made it a joint event, as Mali turns 3 the following day - so we are turning our backyard in to a fairy wonderland!!

Somewhere, in all of that, I will have to find time to get organised for this bubs expo on the 6th. Have appliques and whatever else sewn up. Wednesdays is usually the only real time i have, as it is just me and Tae at home - but look, its almost 11am, I am still in my pyjamas, and not on the sewing machine. Why is it always in my personality to have everything at once and leave everything to the last minute??

Of course, as if that wasn't enough. I am also currently on a weight loss program, The Tony Ferguson, is one of those "replace two meals a day with our shakes or soups" thingos. BUT I did manage to lose 2.2kg and 1cm off my waist in the first week - so I am very happy and working towards 5kg off by the beginning of April, to buy myself a nice new outfit in the next size down!

Anyway, that's where I am at presently. Hope you like the pics I have taken with my new camera!! Nikon D60 YAY!! Looking forwad to 4 days down the coast at Easter, a little relaxing time and can play around with my camera a bit more - try and get a little more creative like my friend Lisa!!

feeling a little bit sentimental and a bit blah

2009-03-07T08:39:00.003+11:00

So, this week I started back at work. Just two days a week, Tuesdays and Thursdays. Some might say, oh, that's nothing, its good to have a life away from the kids..... others might say, how do you fit it in, two kids under 3, one with special needs and different medical appointments, running a household plus a home business? well, others may or may not say that, but all those things are running around in my head and somewhat overwhelming me at the moment.

On the best of days I am not terribly fantastic at time management, but now, right in this minute, I am feeling quite a bit blahhhh about the whole thing, I feel like i have so much to do, or should i say, that I need to spread myself in all different directions and don't know how to.

I know I should just probably write a list, and I am very good at that, but it is making my was through the list, that is the hard part. I make the list and feel totally overwhelmed by it, and then find myself spending all my time reading blogs and forums etc etc

One of the main things i need to do is get on to my sewing machine (which by the way is out of the box now and threaded up) and work on (a) practice practice practice then (b) applique and (c) actually making up the garments. so there is part of my list done. But the problem is how do I do it without it being at the expense of the kids, I don't want Mali to just sit in front of the tv all day while i do it. and now that i am back at work two days, i feel i need to give her my time when I am home. Yesterday Nate was off work, and I thought perfect, I can work in the arvo. But this is how the day went.... morning was taken up by our family trip to the grocery store (a fortnightly event) came home, unpacked the car and fed Tae his lunch (mali was asleep), I was so exhausted from having been awake since 4am (I am not a good sleeper) so I went and lay down for a couple of hours (yes, poor of me, but i think i was also exhausted after the two days back at work). Get up, family trip to the hairdresser down the road, come home, start to get dinner ready, well, actually Nate does this and I tend to the kids, giving Tae his bottle etc. Next thing its dinner, then get the kids sorted for bed, then i am exhausted again.

My energy levels are not good, and this of course could be improved by exercise, but where do i fit that in??

Anyway, enough whinging from me, just had to vent.

A bit about Tae then. At the beginning of the week we went to the docs. Tae had developed a cough and snotty nose the week before, and we had three kids in our social group who we had recently been at parties with etc, who had been diagnosed with Whooping Cough. So a trip to see our lovely doc, who sent us straight up for a swab, and also for a chest x-ray, as he said Tae had a low grade fever and his chest sounded a little rattly. Chest x-ray came back clear, thankfully, and we had to wait on the swab results. I was due to start back at work the next day, so had mum look after Tae for the day. We got the results back on Wednesday and they were all clear too, thankfully (though I have to admit, i was bummed that i couldn't take thursday off work to look after tae - bad me!)

We had a trip back to the speech pathologist and dietician on Wednesday arvo. We have been sooooo lucky with Tae's feeding, and they were so pleased with his progress, that they decided to discharge him. They felt that basically, he was at the level he should be for a 7month old. They will hand back to DADHC now (our disability department) who will take over around communication and vocalisation stuff. The speechy had suggested we move forward to lumpier foods with Tae, and also gave him a rusk. He is not so great with the lumpier foods yet, but loves the good old arrowroot biscuit!

Thursday, I had to go back to work again, so Tae had his first day at Day Care. He had a ball, as I knew he would, and they said they absolutely loved having him, he didn't stop smiling all day, and even the other little kids wanted to be around him all the time.

Yesterday, as I mentioned earlier, we headed out for a hair cut. the plan was just for Nate and I to have a haircut. Mali is still working on growing hair, so not cuts for her in her nearly 3 years of life. But before we left, the hairdresser said, "let me tidy up Tae's hair" ......"ooooh, I don't know...... that's his trademark......" any way, Nate thought it was a good idea, and his hair was looking a little bit on the messy side, so i relented. Here are some pics..... I just didn't want to lose his little curly top, i know it will grow back quickly.....

so, that is my week..... thanks for letting me get some thoughts off my chest. Now, its 9.25am, I need to get out of my pj's and do something with the kids, get them out of the house, its a beautiful day outside.

The past week (or two) - grab a coffee!

2009-02-24T21:20:00.005+11:00

Well, maybe its the past two weeks.... it all just blurrs together really.

I was very pleasantly surprised by a gorgeous bunch of flowers on Valentines Day. Hadn't seen Nate all day, as he had been working, but when he arrived home, he had this gorgeous mixture of Aussie Natives and orchids! Then he cooked one of the best dinners he has ever cooked - sounds a tad strange, but it was soooo yummy - a tandoori chicken, mixed leaf, pine nutes and spiral pasta salad....hhhhhhmmmmmm yum!

Here's a little pic of our family valentines dinner - Tae was quietly playing on his mat too, allowing us to enjoy our dinner.

So, what else has been happening?

Well, Tae was sick last week. Nate and I managed to score another date night :)

we went to a really fantastic Indian restaurant, and then to the movies to see Ghost Town. We are big fans of Ricky Gervais, having watched the UK Office religiously when we lived in England together, and the humor was the same. We got back to my mum and dad's at close to 11pm to pick up the kids, however when I went in to grab Tae, I found he had vomitted in the bed and he was burning hot, and when i picked him up, he vomitted again. We bought him home, showered him and gave him some panadol. Throughout the night, his breathing was heavy and rapid, and his temp was 38.9degrees the next morning, so i took him straight to the doc. It was diagnosed as just a virus, but doc said to bring him back the next day for a follow up. When I took Tae back on the Tuesday, I informed the doc that he had been drooling alot - doc looked in his throat and reported that it was significantly more inflamed than the previous day, and reluctantly prescribed anti-biotics. Thankfully they kicked in pretty quickly, and he is back to himself now.

I know how lucky we have been with Tae - Misty, i have been trying to comment on your blog tonight, but it would not display the word verification, and therefore would not let me post - my thoughts are with you guys always, you are a fantastic mom to Mason and Jaiden, and hopefully now that you guys have a bit more knowledge about what is going on inside little Mason's body, that he will be back on the mend. Totally loved that "not me monday" post too!

We also went back to the physio last week - she is very happy with Tae's progress (he started rolling from his back, right over, arms pulled out, on to his tummy this week!) She is very happy with his tummy time and rolling, and also his toy play and communication. She is not too concerned at this stage with his sitting, though we will practise this, and of course, i had to buy more toys in order to do this! I am concerned about his head control though, and I think this is going to be the one thing that holds him back the most.

Well, I have been flat out working on my Cheeky Chickies clothing range. After 5 or was it 6? Photo shoots, I finally came to a place of contentment with the styles i wanted to run with for Autumn/Winter. I spent days uploading all the new products and information on to my website, updated the Cheeky Chickies blog, and then uploading all the pics on to Skout - the kids designer trade community website that I am on. And, for the most major compliment of all, I have had requests from two kids retail stores, to see my wholesale price list! That means so much, that retail stores like the look of my range enough to want to consider stocking it!

So. The website remains closed, as we have nothing to sell as yet. I have ordered the fabric though, and have placed my first indent order with my manufacturer! You will love this though..... when i sat down looking at costs, and all the bits and pieces i wanted to have in my range... it was all too expensive to have made up professionally. I was out one day, and walked in to a Janome shop. I started by enquiring as to how much it would cost to have them embroider my star appliques, the lady enquired about my range, and the prices quoted by my manufacturer, then turned to me and said, "you could do that yourself, it would save you so much money". So long story short, I have bought my first ever sewing machine!! And now have to learn how to sew :{

Actually, I am really excited about it - I am going to make the simple things myself, the pants, shorts and skirts, and also do the embroidery stitch around the star. Janome will give me a lesson, and the beauty is, that the sale lady actually lives round the corner from me! So I am hoping I can talk her into helping me out more :)

So here's the link to my other blog http://www.freerangeclothing.blogspot.com/

Cheers big ears ....

A Sneak Peak

2009-02-11T12:53:00.005+11:00

So, I have been very busy lately.

As you may now, I have been designing my own range of 100% organic cotton clothing for kids, and if you are to read this post, I trust your utmost discretion, that you won't go letting the cat out of the bag!

This has been very exciting, and I have a lot of passion for this adventure.

I would much rather continue to stay at home doing this than go back to my old job (at the moment) however, this is not paying any bills yet (just making them) and the other job is a steady income. So alas, I start back at work on 3rd March boo hoo!

The process by which I have undetaken in designing and producing my own range has been slightly arduous, however, I have been realistic, and have pretty much remain on track as to the time frame and goals I set myself last August when I first embarked on this journey.

I had my first draft of designs made up in December and we did a photo shoot. Unfortunately it was a very windy day, making it difficult for good photos. But after sitting back over the Christmas break and looking at the shots, I decided to make some changes to the range.

Misty, that piece you commented on from our Christmas Pics (Tae's outfit) was in fact from this first draft, though I am not entirely sure if I will go with it. I do love it on Tae, but will have to see how things go with the launch - thanks for your compliments though!

We are doing a final shoot this Saturday morning, to capture our range for the cooler months, layering of our long sleeve tops under short sleeves and dresses. And will include the wide leg pants, as I may bring them in if the label takes off after we launch.

At the moment I am just waiting for a few changes to be made to our Web Store, and perfecting my blog for the biz. I have to get all the wording right - I may be a bit of a perfectionist, but I want this to be as professional as possible from the outset.

I am being very considerate about my marketing strategies, and hope that they will attract retailers from the word go, as this will in turn fund my production!

So, without further a do, I hereby offer you a sneak peak at some of the range.

If I stay on target, I will launch end of the month!

A week of Firsts.

2009-02-11T10:57:00.005+11:00

So last week we enjoyed a couple of "firsts"

Mali enjoyed her first Dance Class!

She had been invited along by her friend Gracie,

who had attended the dance school the previous year.

This week I bought Mali her first pair of leather jazz shoes.

Oh, it brings back so many memories. I too started dancing when I was 3.

I danced ballet, jazz and tap for many years, and also performed in travelling pantomines!

Let's just hope this mummy can keep the reigns in tight and not try to live vicariously!

Taelan also turned 6 months old on February 1st, and after meeting with our Speech Pathologist and dietitian, who were very pleased with Taelan's progress. We decided to start him on solids. Here is a snapshot of his progress!

Weighing in now at a 5.35kg, he is on 3 meals a day and 4 bottles of formula.

He is a very happy little chappy!

finally!

2009-01-29T13:19:00.002+11:00

not sure if I like

2009-01-29T12:37:00.003+11:00

I decided I would allow the fringe, but really it needs to be thicker and longer, plus I wanted bangs down the sides, and she cut them short, so will leave it to grow and see how it turns out??

The Month That was December

2009-01-16T08:33:00.012+11:00

Ok. This is going to be a long one, so I suggest that you find some quiet time, grab a coffee, and a comfy seat. Areas to be addressed within this post: update on Taelan; Christmas festivities and social events, my grandfather, and seeing in the New Year.

aah, my little man. To start with, he is just adorable. as you would have noted in the photograph on our previous post. So, a lot has occurred since I really gave any adequate update - this now dates back to November 08. All in all he is doing very well. Back in November we established contact with our Department of Disabilities. They were (somewhat surprisingly) very quick to jump on board with an assessment and assistance. At that time, my major concern for Tae was his feeding. He had become extremely fussy, refusing feeds and generally drinking less. Where he had been having weight gains of 200grams a week, he dropped to about 250g for a month. DADHC came and visited us at home on three occasions, a senior physio and a speech pathologist (for the feeding). They explained that whilst Tae was so young, and the issues were related to his physical well being, that the department best to look after any therapy at this stage was Health. DADHC liaised with NSW Health, and also attended appointments with us for support.

At the beginning of December, we attended a Barium Swallow - this is an x-ray where they add barium to Tae's milk feed and x-ray as he drinks. We had the company of the Speechy from DADHC, the speechy from St. George Hospital (which is the closest hospital to us with a paediatric speechy), the speechy from Sydney Children's Hospital, plus two radiographers. The study showed that Tae allows the milk to pool in the back of his mouth, not swallowing when he should, and by the time his tongue registers that there is fluid there, and it needs to complete the swallow action, sometimes its a bit too late for the epiglotus (not sure if that is correct spelling) and its gate action doesn't close in time, so some milk goes in to the wind pipe. Tae does appear though to have a good cough reflex, and there was no aspiration of the liquid in to his lungs - which was great news! Around this time Tae had also developed Bronchitus, so I was extremely worried and had a trip up to the hospital, as I was terrified he had a chest infection or was at risk of pneumonia. Three doctors later and we were told all was clear and just to go home and ride it out.

Last week we met with the Paediatric Speech Pathologist, and Paediatric Dietician at St. George Hospital. This was our first meeting, and I was of the impression that this would be an ongoing relationship for some time. Tae's feeding has improved slightly over the past month, but he varies from being a fuss pot and only drinking 90mL one feed, to scoffing down the full 175Ml the next feed. His refulx is pretty well under control, we have little chucks every now and then, but definately not a consisten thing. Tae's measurements were taken, and he is just under, or on, the 95th centile on the CDLS charts, for head, weight and height - which is great. The speechy recommended going up to the fast flow teets, and we will look to ween Tae off the thickener, and the dietician and speechy both agreed that we could start solids when we wanted. the Speechy suggested that we meet again in a fortnight, though felt that we probably wouldn't need a long term plan, and that hand back to DADHC would be in the not too distant future. This is a very good sign!

Back in December we also had our first meeting with our Paediatric Physio at Sutherland Hospital. This is where I think Tae is going to need the most help. He still lets his head fall back when you try to pull him in to sittin position from laying on his back, and although he is playing with toys and spending time on his tummy and side, I think he is somewhat behind. We have another appointment tomorrow so will hopefully get a regular weekly-fortnightly appointment in place now.

We also ventured to the Sydney Children's Hospital at Randwick the week before Chrissy, for an overnight sleep study. This was an interesting night, and was nice to be able to share it with my friend Dayna, who also attended with her son Logan. Logan is the same age as Mali - in fact, he turns 3 today! (quick Den, call him now while you remember!) Dayna and I have been friends for life - literally - our mother's met in pre-natal classes when they were both pregnant with us - think I have posted on this before - she had her second bub Cameron, three weeks after Tae. Anyway, the slideshow give a bit of an idea of how the night went. We met back with our Paediatrician the next week, and it does appear that Tae has some sleep apnoea. Doc Martin thinks its quite possibly due to enlarged adnoids, and so we now have another specialist to add to the list - ENT appointment booked for March 10th 09. In the mean time we have a steroid nasal spray to give Tae every second night (if only we remembered to give it to him that regularly - would be different if it was daily - yeah, slack parents, but we are pretty derr by night time) - this is to see if we can shrink the adnoids. Doc said this should be accompanied by an improvement in Tae's breathing - as he often has a rattly congested sound to his breathing after feeds,(which I would say is also due to his swallow problem) and in turn an improvement in his feeding - yes, slight, would probably be better if we were more consistent - no to self - get your ass in to gear girl! Luckily he is such a big little boy - being on the 95th centile and all.

Wow, this is long isn't it!

That is pretty much it for Tae, like I said, he is doing very well. He is a real social bub, just loves attention, and communicating with people. Coos away, smiles non stop. is becomming a real mummy's boy, but is especially taken with his big sister.

On to Mali. As we are nearing closer to the age of 3 (April 6) I do see changes in her behaviour. There are times when she is absolutely beautiful. Most days she comes up to me out of the blue, grabs my cheeks with the palms of her hands, plants a big kiss on my lips, then moves to my right cheek (funny little thing) and says "I love you mum". Then in the next breath, lets out this massive roar, throws clothes across the room, slams the bedroom door and yells "you're not my friend MUMMY!" She is improving though, less trouble to take out to the shops, getting braver day by day in the water at the beach, but still as fussy as ever at dinner time. Always brilliant with her brother though, she has not once laid a foot wrong there. when he gets upset, she will try to conjole him, sing him songs, play with him. and she is always giving him cuddles and kisses.

The only thing with December though, was that Christmas seemed to last the entire month. Each week we had a different social event. First it was Christmas Party at Dianella Street Long Day Care, then our Christmas get-together with my ante-natal mother's group at Symbio Wildlife Park, then the Pre-School Christmas Party, then my other Mother's Group Christmas Party - which we hosted - then our family friends Christmas Eve Party and then of course, Christmas Day.

Amongst all this Christmas cheer, my family had the difficult task of saying good bye to my grandfather. My mother's father, we affectionately called Gah, was 90. He was the most beautiful man. Gentle, kind, loving, giving. My mum is an only child, and my grand mother passed away in 2000, so this was very difficult for her, and my sister and I did not want her feeling alone through this. Gah had been reasonably well up to November. He had lived in an aged care facility, in a self-care unit (one where he had his own room and bath etc - but attended the communal dining room for meals). He was quite fit, walking around the gardens and often around the block by himself. In the grand scheme of things, his health deteriorated pretty quickly. He had a number of visits to hospital the previous month, for nose bleads, blood pressure problems and a few falls, this culminated in his last admission to hospital where he had sustained infection. I have a fond memory of taking Mali and Tae in to see Gah in hospital, and giving him our Christmas photo. Mali shared her Choc Chip cookie with him - he had a sweet tooth, something he has passed on to a few of us in the family, and he also had got to hold Tae and see his infectious smile close up. The week after that, things changed rapidly, to the point that we attended his bead, held his hand and prayed that he would find peace. Although he appeared unconscious, you knew he could hear us, a light squeaze of the hand here, a slight change in facial expression there. I owe so much gratitude to my grandfather for assistance he has given me and my sister throughout our lives. We were extremely lucky to be able to attend a Private Girls Grammer school, and my university degree was largely paid for by my grandparents, not to mention the gift of our new kitchen last year. The last words I spoke to my grandfather were words of Thanks, and I feel lucky to have been able to have expressed my gratitude. My grand father passed away on the evening of Saturday 20th December 2008. The following morning, amidst preparations for my Mother's Group Christmas Brunch, I made phone calls to my mother's friends to inform of his passing. We held his funeral on Christmas Eve, and cherished his memory as a family, as we holidayed at he vacation home he bought our family on the NSW south coast.

So, I will end this post with a tribute to my grandfather Gah.

New Header Pic

2009-01-08T13:21:00.002+11:00

So, I have just uploaded a new Header Pic for the blog....

Wish I had a good photo of the two kids together, but alas, not as yet. We recently had some professional pics done of the kids, and this is one of Mali. I love the expression on her face, you can see that behind those dark eyes (which are in fact a greeny hazel), there is a mind on mischief!

Also attached is a couple more pics.

By the way, forgot to add to my To Do List "cleaning all the bottles and washing dishes". Am currently half way through sorting out my wardrobe, luggage still sitting on the dining table.

To Do List

2009-01-08T12:20:00.003+11:00

Having arrived home yesterday afternoon from a couple of weeks down the south coast, I am now ready to embrace 2009!

Only one problem...... where do I start?

So I will make my "To Do List" here.... and endeavour to tick the boxes in the "right" order....

eat lunch.... tick
un pack my bag from holidays
make room in my wardrobe for new items of clothing purchased whilst on hols... be ruthless girl!
unpack the kids bags from holidays
make room in the kids wardrobe for all the new clothing they received for Christmas
pack in to storage all of Tae's 0000 clothing, as he is now in to 000 - YAY!!!
pay bills
do the grocery shopping
clean up the house.... it looked so neat and tidy when the kids and I arrived home yesterday, thanks Nate, and sorry Nate, as we have messed it all up again!
do some blogging... finally....
upload photos from Christmas, NYE and Holiday fun....
finish my house renovation plans and get Nate to draw them up on the computer
sort out what i am doing with my new clothing range.... get my "plan" on to paper and out of my head so I can get some sleep at night...
find some money to do what i want to do with my biz and clothing range
pay some more bills
figure out where Tae is going to go when I start back at work in March
fix up my calender with upcomming specialist appointments
organise a date night for Nate and i, boy we need some quality alone time....
get rid of the tin of shortbread in the fridge, as Nate says, its like eating solid fat.
any chance of a kip?

I can't believe its been nearly three weeks....

2008-12-16T16:59:00.002+11:00

since I last blogged..... Well, yes I can really. It's been busy, I have been suffering terribly through the nights with Hay Fever/Allergies and have not been sleeping well, and all-in-all, I have been feeling a little overwhelmed with my life at present. What's been happening? you might ask .... in a nutshell.... lots of specialist appointments for Tae, lots of social events, keeping Amalia amused, working on my biz - getting in my samples and doing photo shoots, visiting my 90 year old grandfather in hospital, getting excited about my new little craft project and trying to lose weight in our little village's "Biggest Loser" competition - while my metabolism is almost non-existent whilst I am under stress.....

As a result, a couple of things in my life have alas gone a miss, these include my much loved blogging, and oh dash, the house work!

So, over the coming days, I do intend to update my blog, going in to the abovementioned aspects in a little more detail.... but never fear..... I am still here..... a little emotionally battered and bewildered.... but just as the Duracell Bunny ... I keep going...and going.... and going......

A Trip to the Zoo!

2008-11-26T16:01:00.002+11:00

Yes, that's right! Yesterday we took a trip to Sydney's Taronga Zoo. The zoo is located at Manly, on Sydney Harbour. As you will see, the backdrop is stunning.

The Trip was a birthday present from our friend Aunty Siany. Tae stayed with mum for the day, and I got to relax and enjoy myself, as Sian drove and took care of Mali. We also met up with our friend Cherie and her little boy Will.

The weather was typical for what we have been experiencing lately, one week out from summer - forecast 22degrees, it was cold and cloudy, then it was sunny and hot, we were just very lucky not to get any rain!

So, I have broken up all my thousands of photos from the day in to three slideshows - Enjoy!

A Feeding Nightmare

2008-11-26T09:08:00.004+11:00

For a week and a half now, Tae has been very difficult with his feeds. It varies, sometimes he gets quite upset, but mostly he just fights the bottle. Pushing it out with his tongue, spitting out the milk, smiling with the teet in his mouth, grabbing on to my finger or hand and pulling the bottle out of his mouth, and pushing off my lap with his very strong legs, as soon as I attempt to seat him in position for his feed. We are very lucky if we can get most of his milk down him, many feeds he is only getting through 90-100mL and then we still have some chucks as well. I was so worried, that I ended up calling our Paediatrician after a week, and he has written up a script for Ranitidine (a medication to neutralise stomach acid), as my concern was that he was suffering with his reflux pain, and that is why he wasn't up for his feeds.

We had three days where things went back to normal, but then monday fussy feeding started up again. We were booked in to see Doctor Martin (aka "Boots") on Monday, and have upped the dosage, and also have a referral for Barium testing with x-rays to look at his reflux and digestive system. Another referral is for the sleep clinic, and should be heading there the week before Christmas - this is to check out whether there is any sleep apnoea.

Tae weighed in at a wopping 4.36kg!! and his length and head measurements have continued decent growths. Doc had a little checklist he had written for himself, and had found an article with guidelines on treatment planning for CdLS. He seems like a nice guy this doc, and also appears to harbour some quiet excitement about Tae's "case", which I believe is a really good thing. If he finds this interesting, being a rare genetic condition, he will be more enthusiastic and passionate in his care and treatment of Tae. Not that he isn't with all his patients, but may just give that little extra attention to detail.

Anyway, I hope Tae's feeding improves soon, its both frustrating and worrying for me when he won't eat - even though I know that he is having good weight gains. But also after reading more about complications with GastroIntestinal Reflux Disease, aspirating, pneumonia. My head has been spinning lately. A couple of nights ago an email came through from the Yahoo CdLS group, from a mother who had just lost her 4 year old son. They thought he had a little cold (nothing out of the norm for this child apparently), and as mum prepared dinner, the little boy napped on the lounge. Mum came back to find that he had stopped breathing, and despite her attempts and those of paramedics, he could not be revived. The news has been heartbraking to the entire Yahoo CdLS community - and we have all pulled our kiddies in close and tight with tears in our eyes. I don't have knowledge on the general condition of this little boy's health, but it makes me so worried for Tae - he seems to have developed a little cough over night too.

Sorry, this last paragraph has become more of a babble of stress. I think I might go and have a lie down with Tae. I will finish this post with some pics of our feeding antics.

Mum thinks I don't want my bottle, but I am just protesting

this pink bib my big sister made me wear!

Play Park Tuesday

2008-11-19T13:11:00.007+11:00

Every Tuesday I meet up with a few funky mums and we take the kiddies to a local park. We like to throw in some variety, and usually go somewhere different each week. This little park was suggested by Dayna, it is just near the boat ramp off Holt Rd, Sylvania Waters. It was a mild day temperature wise, but the wind did funny things every now and then. Always an enjoyable get together though - so here are some happy snaps.

For my mom friends over the other side of the world, I have noticed the word "funky" seems to be used differently over there - FYI we use it as a term meaning hip, trendy etc. Cheers!

Last Wednesdays Blog Challenge

2008-11-19T13:11:00.005+11:00

(just found this pic, it was the photo I snapped for last week's Wordless Wednesday Blog Challenge - the theme was "View from my Window" - better late than never)

Update on Taelan

2008-11-18T07:32:00.002+11:00

So, lately we have had a few different tests and specialist appointments, and I am happy to say that it is good news all round!

We got a phone call from our Paediatrician's receptionist, she reported "Just ringing to let you know that Dr Martin has received the results from Taelan's head and renal scans and they have come back normal - Doc just wanted to let you know that" - well thank you Doc!

Last friday our little family (yes, all four of us took the trip together) were in at Sydney Children's Hospital at 8am for the Cleft Palate Clinic. I have noted before, Tae doesn't have a cleft palate, but the Geneticist thought it was worth checking out to see if he had a submucal (not sure if correct spelling) cleft, where the muscles aren't working properly, but there is not a clear gap present (or something to that effect). We met with a gorgeous plastic surgeon, who informed us that sometimes this can be present, but may not be properly detected til the child is closer to 2years of age - and specifically in relation to speech issues. She was not able to see any issues with this stage, but has requested that we come back again when Tae is 1 and he will also get checked out for any middle ear blockages (which are apparently common with palate issues) by EarNoseThroat specialist.

(it was a busy day last friday. We were up at 5.30am to feed tae and get ready, then in to the hospital - which is about an hours drive - then when we finished with the doc - which luckily was nice and quick, as we were first cab off the rank - we had to get back to Cronulla to get to swimming lessons for Mali at 10am - whilst Nate sat in the park attempting to feed Tae - who has been very challenging with feeding of late. After this, we headed to Miranda Fair for lunch and our fortnightly grocery shop -pheww!)

Yesterday afternoon, little man and I headed back to the hospital for a 2pm appointment with the Heart Specialist. We were pushing it, as I had to drop my fabric in at the factory where my new clothing range is being made up - well the samples at this stage anyway. I grabbed a salad from Maccas and headed over to the hospital. Got to the Outpatient's Clinic right on 2pm, took a seat and scoffed down my salad. Tae was due his feed, but was asleep, and i wasn't sure how long it would be before we went in. At 2.45pm Tae woke, so I thought I should feed him. He has been really difficult to feed lately, pushing the bottle away with his tongue, and spitting milk everywhere. By the time I finally got him in to some consistent drinking, and half way through the bottle, we were called in - typical of course. They took an ultrasound of his heart, and doc had a listen. Our geneticist and a previous Paediatrician had thought they had detected a faint murmur, but neither were concerned, calling it "innocent". The Heart Specialist could not detect anything himself, nor did anything show up in the ultrasound. He explained that faint murmurs are quite common, and do come and go. He was not concerned, and did not suggest any further follow up.

So at this stage, all going good. We meet back up with our Paediatrician next Monday, and next Thursday we have a visit from a clinician from our Department of Aging, Disability and Home Care (DADHC - acronym used regularly and pronounced Dadec - for my mum, whom every time I use the acronym, looks at me blankly). I am very much looking forward to this visit, I referred Taelan myself the other week, upon suggestion by my colleague, the Senior OT at Community Health (where I work when not on maternity leave). They are going to come out and do a comprehensive needs assessment, upon which they will make reccommendations, refferals etc for therapy and early intervention services for Tae. As you can see in our photos, we continue to practise tummy time and holding toys etc, but other than that, I have no idea what else to do, how tae is doing with it, and really really want some case management and guidance!! So, hopefully soon we will have some active therapy on board!

Family Night

2008-11-16T19:30:00.004+11:00

We are so lucky that my mum and dad, and my sis and her hubby, live just around the corner from us. We are a very close knit family, and eat together regularly. This night we are at mum and dad's. Although I didn't get any good shots of the rest of the fam, I went a bit snap happy with Nate, and it turned him a bit loopy! Like Lisa's Date Night - of which I wish I could be posting on - our Family Nights will be a regular posting.

modelling and mayhem

2008-11-16T16:46:00.004+11:00

With my business, I save money by taking my own photos of the kids dressed up in all our gear. You probably have heard it all before, nothing is worse than working with children and animals!

Yes, it is hard work, but can also be a lot of fun, and I tell you, I learn a new lesson every time we shoot.

This particular night we had my gorgeous friend Naomi around with her kids Inez and Kailin - Inez is one of my regular models, but alas, will be too big to photograph my own clothing label, as I am starting with a smaller size range. Her brother will look very handsome in our organic range though.

We had a yummy dinner, and then photographed the kids out in the garden - i don't normally shoot at night, but we got a few good snaps - this one of Mali I cropped from another shot - yes, getting better at this photography game!

Love this pic of Naomi and Tae, much to Naomi's dissapproval I am sure - but had to put it in!

A Trip to Camelia Gardens

2008-11-16T14:17:00.002+11:00

We are very lucky to have this gorgeous park in our Sutherland Shire. It is located on a rolling slope, beautiful manicured grassed areas, lush rainforest type trees, ponds and creeks with ducks and geese, a yummy cafe with playground, and plenty of space and winding paths.

I downloaded this picasa program after watching the great little slide shows on Hope's Blog - her daddy is so clever and funny - I am not there yet, just simple shots, but thought it would be cute.

Whenever I do get my fancy shmancy new digital SLR I will definately be coming back for more shots!

There in black and white

2008-11-16T13:53:00.004+11:00

So, we received a letter from our Geneticist, and also a copy of a letter he has sent to the Consultant Paediatrician who originally assessed Tae in hospital. There it was, in black and white, no denying, reality. Although we had come to terms with Tae's condition, I couldn't help but blink away a few tears as I read it in the letter.

There were a couple of bits in the doctor's letter that i have chosen to attach to this blog, I suppose as a way of highlighting where the story begins....

I valued this part of the letter, it was personal, and showed empathy, something that does not always come with medical expertise.

I don't necessarily believe that others are placing expectations on me to cope - I would say it is more in my personality characterics that I just get on with things, however perhpas sometimes at a detriment, or get on with too many things..... I sent copies of these letters to my mother-in-law, and I hope she doesn't mind me including this excerpt from her return email. I feel this is something I perhaps need to remind myself, thus why I am posting it on my blog.

"I have to say, having read your blog every day that my one worry is that Deni you have set yourself in "overdrive" and you cannot sustain this physically or mentally, alone. So, it was a relief to see on the letter from Mr Kirk that he had highlighted this and made it clear that you cannot be expected, as it is not humanly possible, to cope with everything, all the time. We have no doubt that you will be exceptional in your approach to Taelan's development and present every possible advantage before him to ensure that he get's the best chance but as Mr Kirk says, making use of all the options of support outside the home will not only advance Taelan's development further but relieve some of the pressure for you both in the home."

a busy day out

2008-11-07T17:21:00.006+11:00

Taelan and I had a big day out on Wednesday - and no, it did not consist of any doctor's appointments! One of my friends reminded me early on, how important it will be for Tae to spend quality time with other bubs his age, as they will model the behaviours that he is working towards. Tae is such a sociable little man and loves being with other kids.

The morning started at our friend Lucy's house - she was kind enough to host a party for me with her mother's group, but it was lovely to socialise and Tae (taking after his sister as mummy's model in his very cute Barefoot Kids shorts) enjoyed watching all the older babies crawling and playing around him.

In the afternoon, we travelled down the street to our friend Dayna. Dayna and I have been best of friends since birth, as our mums met when they were pregnant with us. Dayna has a little boy Logan (who is 2months older than Mali) and another little boy Cameron, who was born a few weeks after Tae - we know they are going to be the closest of buddies!

Our other friend, Aunty Siany, also came to Dayna's and bought a very scrumptious afternoon tea treat!

The Ultimate Stress Buster

2008-11-06T11:51:00.004+11:00

Taelan is such a funny little man, lately he has started to laugh, it is such a crack up, it really is the best therapy. He will be smiling at you and then these funny little "heeey" noises come out - it is so cute. This pic was my best still capture of him laughing.

Hey Lady! Mali is beautiful too!

2008-11-06T11:03:00.003+11:00

I think I mentioned before that we have always been surprised at the number of people who stop us when we are out and about, to comment on Tae. "Oh how small he is" "oh, what a beautiful baby", "Oh, what gorgeous eyelashes". The other day, we were out at a shopping centre when two older ladies came up while I was feeding Tae. They commenced their deliberations, and looked up at Mali and said "Isn't your baby brother beautiful - Don't you have a beautiful brother". Mali's response was to stick her finger up her nose - which shocked and horrified her father and I - but I also felt angry and upset, that this woman, a stranger, would not tell Mali how beautiful she was too - albeit not so charming. SO this blog is to my BEAUTIFUL and CHEEKY baby girl!

practising

2008-11-06T10:52:00.002+11:00

We continue to practise holding our rattles. I don't know if I am being way over the top, neurotic, but with so much of this condition being out of our contorl, I suppose I am grasping to any inch of influence over Tae's future that I can muster. I will not look back in time and say "if only I did this or that" I will do everything I possibly can to assist Tae's development, in the hope that this ensures only the mildest effects of the condition on his intellectual and physical development.

fruit salad.... yummy yummy

2008-11-06T10:31:00.002+11:00

Mali would sit and watch tv and dvd's all day if we let her, and some days, I am ashamed to say, it has been pretty close to that. Most days I try to get her out of the house in the mornings, down to the park, catching up with friends, but the weather has been all over the shop as late, so I am trying to become more creative inside. Some mums may read this and think "what planet has this woman been on?" and I will be taking notes from FlipFlops & Apple Sauce, but you see, before Tae, I was working full time 5 days a week, and now I have all this time at home with a very active two and a half year old. So this is a good start I think! Making fruit salad - and of course, singing the wiggles as we work!

tired little man

2008-11-01T21:05:00.004+11:00

I just love this little outfit from Sprout - well, I just love red really! I can't wait to see my new clothing line - my first samples will be produced in the next couple of weeks, our organic cotton fabric is being cut at the beginning of the week, and then I will send it to my manufacturer for production. I have this really cute litte romper that I can't wait to see on Tae!

On Thursday Tae and I headed back in to the Hospital and had our Kidney and Head Ultrasound. I asked the sonographer if there was anything he noticed, but his reply was that it was not for him to say anything, the results would go to my doctor and they would discuss it with me. I understand that this is the position he is in, but it does make you worry that something came up??!! Just have to wait and see.

Note to self..... don't worry about that which you cannot control. If there is something to come from the ultrasounds, then deal with it when if and when it comes to fruition.

Tae's New Hat

2008-11-01T20:24:00.004+11:00

Up until now, Tae's head has been too small for any sun hat to fit. Yesterday, I was excited to make this purchase, the smallest sun hat I have been able to find!

Taelan's new play mat

2008-11-01T19:51:00.003+11:00

Love at First Sight!

This gorgeous Play Mat was a gift for Tae when he was born, from our friends Carol and Steve. We finally got it out and set it up today, and Tae is just in love! Mali also got in on the act.

Time honoured tradition

2008-11-01T18:54:00.002+11:00

Fish and Chips at Darook Park Beach has been a time honoured tradition since I was a wee child. Last night was our first for 08/09 summer, and although the southerly was raging, we found a great sheltered spot. Nate was relaxed and enjoyed a laugh and Mali was well looked after by mum, Aunty Trish and Meredith (who took her on a great long walk to the other end of the beach and back). It was a long night for Mali, but she had a ball playing with Aunty Siany and her cat Sookie. Would have taken more photos but the camera run out of batter:{

Mum, Mali and Aunty Trish

spring in Sydney?

2008-10-30T11:34:00.003+11:00

Before Taelan was born, I had bought a few outfits. This little jacket was one of them. It was a size 0000, and considering Tae was due in August, being Winter, I thought it would look very cute. Due to his birth size though, we are only just in 0000 now, but thankfully, Sydney's Spring weather is a bit of a mixed bag, and yesterday, with temps topping 17degrees, we got to dress Tae in his little jacket and get these happy snaps!

thoughts and prayers

2008-10-30T11:03:00.003+11:00

I wanted to thank everyone for the emails, phone calls and texts we have received. As a psychologist, I know how important it is to draw strength from the love and support of those who love you. To be open and honest, sharing experiences, rather than bottle it up, only to explode later having tried to put a lid on the high pressure. Because of this, getting it out there, and getting such wonderful, thoughtful responses and prayers from everyone, I can move forward and get on with living a full life for myself and my little ones. I will be MORE than the best mother I can be to Mali and Tae.

A friend emailed me last night, and I hope she doesn't mind me including this in my blog.

"I have been thinking what to write in this email to u and Nate for the last couple of days. I really don't know where to start, I have read your email and have also read your blog...it brought tears to my eyes and I have been thinking of you both heaps since. This is where I don't know what to say...., I'm so sorry to hear about Tae's diagnosis & the possible challenges you may face with Tae in the future, (I also know how much joy he & Mali are going to add to your life in the future too, as a mum of two!!!! ) It just doesn't seem fair that life should be so hard. I could see your special bond with Tae and I know this will never change and day by day it will only grow stronger. When u are feeling down take out the photos of Tae with that cute smile and Mali cuddling upto him and remember you can do this, just as u said one day at a time. Your personality, experience and positive thinking will help you get through the harder days and of course 2 gorgeous kids plus the love and support from family and friends WILL also help...... I just wanted u to know that I have read your email but am a little unsure of what to say face to face or over the phone so to speak, without u getting upset or me upsetting u"

Nate and I are so lucky to have such wonderful and loving friends and family around us.

I wanted to let everyone know that we are all GOOD. Every now and then a thought pops in to my head and a tear gathers in my eye, but for the most part, we are getting on with living life. I continue to dream up new designs and how Cheeky Chickies will be the next Pumpkin Patch. Nate wonders what I have added to his To Do List, and how we are going to get the monstrous timber cubby house from John and Tracey's, down the road, and in to our backyard. And Mali, well she wonders whether Santa will still bring her that cubby house and swing set if she decorates mummy's bedroom with the sun cream again.

things i like....

2008-10-30T10:29:00.002+11:00

Thanks Dayna - for coming to the rescue yesterday!

things I don't like so much.....

2008-10-30T10:18:00.001+11:00

Thanks Nate

Wordless Wednesday/Special Exposure Blog Challenge

2008-10-29T15:39:00.004+11:00

A morning at the park

2008-10-29T14:26:00.003+11:00

The must have caramel milk shake.

Yesterday morning we took a trip down to Stanwell Park - Mali, Tae and I. We met with some of our friends and enjoyed the morning outdoors, the beautiful backdrop of Stanwell Tops and watched the hang gliders.

Mali's favourite playground equipment is the swings. I am gaining inspirations from Lisa's blog and giving my camera a good work out. Unfortunately its not the best camera, hopefully we can eventually upgrade to a decent SLR. Nate has a fantastic SLR camera, with macro and fish eye lenses, however it is the old version (can't even remember what they are called now - before digital, using film). I was hoping that the lenses would fit on to a new digital camera, if he bought the same brand etc - that way it would not be so much of a waist, but not sure if this is going to happen?

Anyway, here's my attempt at shooting some interesting swing action.

I disappointed that I was not able to get Tae out and on to a play mat (had even packed a few of his toys), but the flies were just so horrific, that after his feed, I put him straight back in his pram with the screen cover on. He did have a good old chat to Monkey Buddie though.

Meeting the Paediatrician

2008-10-29T13:10:00.003+11:00

Tae loves his teddy mobile - lays watching and smiling and laughing

So on Monday we headed to Miranda to meet with our new Paediatrician. Young guy, probably not much older than me and Nate, two young kids himself. I came away with a good feeling, like I had made a connection I suppose, and that this was somebody who was going to be with us for the long haul. He didn't pretend to be an expert, though was familiar with the condition, noting Tae's appearance with recognition, but also said that he would go away and read up more on CdLS before we met again in a month. He was genuine.

Taelan weighed in a wopping 3.8kg! I was really impressed - he is putting on about 200grams a week. But doc also noted concern regarding his head size. We (mum came with me) commented that we never thought he looked as though his head was small, but doc showed me where he sat on the graph. When he was born, his weight and length were under the 3rd centile, but his head was on (or just above) the 3rd centile. As the weeks progressed and subsequent measurements have been taken, Tae's weight and length have increased along the same trajectory (just under the 3rd centile), however his head circumfrence has dropped significantly below the 3rd centile, not continuing on its original course as it should have. The implications being that this would adversely effect his brain and intellectual development.

Doc commented that Taelan is demonstrating some very positive behaviours, smiling, making eye contact and reacting, following objects, and made suggestions for things I can do at home to encourage further development, lots of tummy time, play, teaching him how to hold a rattle (to help him open his hands and arms more). Doc also suggested that we keep an eye on his sleep and specifically his breathing during sleep (with perhaps a referral to a sleep clinic down the track), as this could be related to his brain/head development, say for example, if he suffered from sleep apnoea, where oxygen to his brain was comprimised, this would stunt growth. As such, I have barely slept the last two nights.....

So between now and the next appointment, doc is going to look in to therapy options, between private services and our government health services (I will have a chat to my colleagues at the Community Health Centre), and I will be doing lots of play therapy at home, trying to get sleep myself, and watching out for little man to hit his milestones, such as rolling on his play mat.

Attached are some photos of Tae yesterday afternoon, holding his rattle and even shaking it about a little. I have also noticed that when I have had Tae up over my shoulder, he is patting the back of my shoulder and feeling with open palm to get a grasp on my back - the little things that would normally go unnoticed become so important!

And so our new life begins....

2008-10-26T08:27:00.013+11:00

On Thursday 16th October I headed back to the Paediatrician at Royal Women's. It was a different doctor, and older and seemingly more exprienced doctor. He looked over Tae with a concerned expression, then asked his colleague to consult and give his opinion. They both expressed concern with Taelan's head size and suggested that we see a Geneticist. I informed them that I already had an appointment for the end of November, as I had met with geneticists after Tae was born.

The doctor also suggested that I see my GP, to get a referral to a local Paediatrician and an Early Intervention Program. The doc was reluctant to give any possible diagnosis, informing me that there were about 25,000 different syndromes and that it would be best to meet with the specialists - the geneticists - for more comprehensive answers. I enquired as to what his specific concerns were, aside from Taelan's small stature, and he indicated to Taelan's small hands and feet, and that he did not appear to be reaching out for things, rather, kept his hands tight towards his body.

At this point I laid it on the doc. Being that I am a psychologist and work for Community Health, I am experienced at working with special needs etc, and can take whatever he has to say. I want to be educated and prepared (the control freak in me). Doctor responded, stating that he feels pretty strongly that Taelan may have "delaney syndrome". Well, that was what I thought his asian accent said - in hindsight, I should have asked him to write it down. He did not elaborate, and I did not ask him what this meant. More than likely as a self-protective behaviour. I just said that I would research it when I got home.

That night I sat on the computer, busily attempting to locate information on "Delaney Syndrome" which of course, doesn't exist. I was starting to pull my hair out, thinking "OMG how can I survive the next 12 hours without knowing what he was talking about!" Eventually I came across "Cornelia de Lange Syndrome", and upon reading about the features associated with this genetic condition, Nate and I sighed and nodded. Even if we tried to look for other explanations "Mali also has thick long eyelashes!" there was no escaping the truth and the reality.

A week later, we had achieved an earlier appointment with the geneticists, and a confirmation on the diagnosis was made. The doctor actually informed us that they had suspicions when they first met Taelan in hospital, but after consultation with colleagues, decided not to inform us, in case they were wrong. Doc asked how we felt about this, and whether we would have preferred to have known back then. In reply, I informed the doctor of my strong belief that "things happen for a reason" and that Taelan and I had a fantastic bond, so it was meant to have worked out this way - I thanked him for his honesty though.

Naturally, we have shed many tears - "I won't guild the lily" (good old Ruddy) - it is heartbraking to learn that your baby has hard times ahead, but it is what it is, and we have had to come to terms with the reality. I won't go in to a full description of the syndrome, instead, I urge readers to follow the link http://www.cdls.org.uk/information/index.htm. We have looked at many websites and have found this UK version to be the easiest and clearest to read. As Taelan is only 12 weeks old, it is difficult to say what level of development we are looking at. Taelan is blessed with all his fingers and toes, a head of hair that his sister would die for, beautifully defined eyebrows and the most stunning long eye lashes, and of course, the cheekiest and cutest of smiles! Features that literally, have strangers stopping to tell us how gorgeous he is, every single time we venture out together.

So what is ahead for us in the near future. We have an appointment on Monday 27th October with our new local Paediatrician, and hope to get into an Early Intervention Program as soon as possible, to do whatever we can to grow and nurture Taelan's development. Although the geneticist was also concerned with Taelan's size, he was very happy with Taelan's smiling and engagement. We also have referrals for a heart specialist, and the cleft palate clinic at Sydney Children's Hospital (although Tae does not have a visible cleft palate, the doc thought it necessary to check out in case their was a small gap causing the nasal regurgitation).

We know there will be lots of ups and downs, and we will have to take one step at a time, but we know that we have the love and support of masses of family and friends, and Taelan will have every opportunity in life to let his light shine!

Bringing bub home

2008-10-25T19:06:00.009+11:00

We were so excited to be bringing bub home, though were a little naive to what was ahead of us. I was still very unwell, my coughing keeping me up all through the night. It was a horrid choking cough that at times had me gasping for air, and other times actually made me vomit. Two days after bringing bub home, I met with our local GP. He diagnosed an infection of the sinus and started me on a course of antibiotics, antihystamines and codeine phosphate (a cough suppressant). Due to Tae's very small size, doc requested that I stop breastfeeding whilst on all the medication (so as not to put bub at risk) and instead suggested I express to keep up my supply to hopefully return to breastfeeding when I was well again.

Four courses of medication and 20 days later I finally finished the medication - I had continued to express five times a day over that period. I had been receiving fantastic support from the Early Childhood Clinic nurses, and was booked in for a day stay to assist with re-commencing breastfeeding. I had been weighing Tae every week, and he had just hit 2.5kg at 5 weeks of age. A few days before my visit to Possum Cottage, I started Tae back on the breast myself - initially he seemed ok, but then I needed to use the shield again, as he tired pretty quickly. Unfortunately though, when we attended the day stay, the nurse informed me that Taelan appeared to really struggle, and when we weighed him, he had lost a heap of weight in just that week, falling back down to 2.34kg. It was suggested that I once again go back to expressing my breast milk and feeding Tae using the bottle, when Tae was strong enough, he may be able to go on the breast.

Again I continued to express, though it kept getting harder and harder. Tae was struggling with feeds, sometimes it would take an hour to feed him just 60mL and other times he would projectile vomit, or seize up and vomit through his nose. When Tae was 6 weeks, I took him to a follow up appointment with the paediatrician at the hospital. He was very concerned for Taelan's weight, and also diagnosed gastrointestinal reflux. The doctor again mentioned the simeon crease on Taelan's palm, and although he remained convinced that it was not Down Syndrome, he spoke of concern that Tae was "syndromy". He did not elaborate on this, and I did not ask (probably cause I didn't want to think about it). Another appointment was made for him in four weeks time, and I continued to attend the Early Childhood Clinic weekly.

The next few weeks Tae showed great weight gains, and we moved from 000000 to 00000 clothing. At his 8 week check up at the Clinic we checked off the developmental boxes. Yes, Taelan was smiling, yes Taelan would follow you with his eyes and react to loud noises. Yes, Taelan could be settled by familiar voices like his mummy. He seemed to be pretty well on track and in the following weeks he also started making some cooing sounds (the only box that had not been ticked at the 8 week check up). By the time our next appointment at the Paediatrician's clinic came around, Tae was weighing in at a wopping 3.4kg!!

Introducing Taelan Christopher Clay Fowle

2008-10-25T19:05:00.011+11:00

On Friday 1st August 2008, Nate and I made our way in to the Royal Women's Hospital in Randwick Sydney. We arrived just after nine am and were sent to have my blood taken. We then made our way to "Day Surgery" (we thought that sounded a little strange) and waited to complete paperwork. We sat with a friend Mel, whom I had met during my weekly visits to the Pregnancy Day Stay.

At about 12noon I was given my beautiful hospital gown and told to take a shower and change (I am sure I took the longest shower in history) and soon after, we were escorted down to the delivery surgery. Having been through Ceser prep with Amalia, I was a little more relaxed as I sat on the edge of the bed, having the epidural and spinal block inserted. Nate was not in such a great place, as he had not had any lunch, so was ushered out to a seat and given some water.

As I lay on the operating table, I did my best to control my coughing. For the past week and a half I had suffered from a horrid uncontrollable cough and sinus head cold. The surgery commenced, and several times Doc stopped to allow me coughing time, and then I had to basically hold my breath. Finally our little one was born! I waited and waited, but no one said the words..... "its a ...." Nate had handed the camera over to one of the nurses, and I strained to check out the genital area...... "what is it?" I said. With Amalia, we had found out her sex at 19weeks (though kept it a secret between Nate and I), however we had not with our second pregnancy, we wanted the surprise, and it was! A Boy! A very little boy.... weighing 2405grams

Nate and I were so estatic, and I could wait to get up to the room and hold him. With Amalia, I really suffered in recovery, the whole experience was pretty awful. But with Tae, I was on top of the world, felt no pain, no shakes in recovery. It wasn't long before I was wheeled up to my room. Before entering I was greeted by a doctor, he introduced himself and asked if I minded if he checked over my son.... not at all... please come in and see our great little creation!

A little white later, my obstetrician arrived... "do you mind if my colleague checks over your baby"...."no, not at all" (said proud mummy). After the consult my obstetrician turned to me.... "I suppose you are wondering why these doctors have been looking over your baby".... smile starts to slowly fade...... no, I hadn't been, I had just been a very proud happy mummy, but this does not sound good...... "well, when your baby was delivered, one of the clinicians in the delivery suite noticed that you baby had a simeon crease (a straight line crease on his palm - rather than two creases across his palm) and this is a feature of Down Syndrome. My two colleagues though have checked over your baby, and don't believe he has Down Syndrome, though we are going to get the Consultant Paediatrician to check him out tomorrow.

Crushed...... battered.......deflated........our excitement snuffed..... but we had to hold our heads up as my mother, father and sister were on their way in with Amalia. We put our happy faces on, and introduced them to "Tiny Tae"...... they were all so excited to be meeting the little man.

The next twelve hours were agonising, though we finally met with the Consultant, and he also did not feel that Tae had Down Syndrome. As it was still unclear as to why Taelan was so small, he suggested that his colleague, a geneticist, attend on Monday to meet with us and bub. We agreed, of course, but I kept telling myself that his size didn't matter. He had not been taken to the NICU or special care nursery (apparently if he was 5grams less he would have gone straight to special care) ...... to me he was just small, and as I had read, 85% of SGA babies were normal and healthy, just small.

In the first few days we had trouble with Taelan's feeds and he lost nearly 300grams. I was not concerned, as Amalia had also been a little bugger with her feeding and would not latch on ... though understandably she was born 3.85kg ..... somewhat bigger than Tae. We continued on, and after 5 days in hospital we were both allowed to go home, Taelan now 2.17kg and feeding partly with the nipple shield and also given a top up bottle of expressed breast milk.

As we had no clothes to fit Tae, Mum ventured out to purchase a "going home" Outfit. She got a 00000 set from Best and Less, though this was a tad on the large size.

My second pregnancy

2008-10-25T18:55:00.011+11:00

With Amalia, we had been trying for 12 months before finally falling pregnant. When we decided that we wanted to add to our little family, we were very surprised when we had a "one hit wonder"!

The first three months were pretty average, although I did feel a little sicker than with Mali. We had our first ultrasound and NT Scan - nothing major, scan dated bubs size to be approximately 6 days behind our estimated due date (16th August 2008) - not something to be concerned about, and NT and blood results put us in a 1 in 25000 chance of the baby having Down Syndrome and about a 1 in 8000 chance of having an alternative chromosomal abnormality - putting us in the very low risk category.

As the pregnancy continued, I was determined not to put back on the 26kg I had with Amalia, and was conscious of my diet. Saying that though, I had a piece of chocolate every day (in moderation of course). Still I had a niggling thought in the back of my mind, that I wasn't putting on much weight and that the baby could be suffering somehow, as I had only put on 5kg. Our 19 week scan came along and again, no major concerns were stipulated, though the sonographers commented that the baby's size appeared to be a week behind the EDD, no special referrals were made.

As we continued through the second trimester, I decided to book an ultrasound at 28weeks. I had a 4D ultrasound done when I was pregnant with Amalia and wanted to get the same done for this pregnancy. Nate managed to get some time off work, and we headed in to the city. When we sat with the sonographer, she asked why we were having the scan done at this stage (as it is not a regular procedure) - I didn't want to say that it was only to get the 4D shot, so I told her that there was some concern at the 19 week scan that the baby's size was a week behind. The sonographer said that they would not normally be concerned for a week, but anything over ten days would be cause for concern. The sonographer looked over the baby, limbs, heart, head - a circumference measurement was taken, and taken again, then a third time. same with the abdominal measurements. At this point, the sonographer informed us that the baby was currently measuring in two weeks behind gestational age (as per estimated due date), and suggested we stay and wait for the specialist.

The next couple of weeks all seemed to blur together. Initially the bub's size was placed on the 5th centile (anything below the 10th centile was considered a concern and SGA "small for gestational age") and by the followup scan two weeks later, bub had dropped down to the 2nd centile. We were referred from our local hospital, to the specialist hospital at Randwick (Royal Women's) and I had an appointment for 9am the next day. I was informed by doctor's that our bub was "symmetrically small for gestational age" meaning that the "whole package was small". The research I did on the net said that 85% of symmetrically SGA babies turned out to be normal and healthy babies, just small, and the other 15% "intra uterine growth restricted" babies were due to chromosomal abnormalities, infections and placental problems.

For the next ten weeks, I headed to the hospital twice a week for CTG's (monitoring the baby's heart), growth scans every ten days and weekly appointments with the obstetrician. Aside from bub's size, which was always small, but continued to grow, heart beat was always strong, as were all the movements. We also discovered that bub had lots and lots of head hair - a surprise considering our first still has barely any at two and a half years of age (but perhaps explained the awful acute reflux I had been suffering).

Towards the end of July, doc suggested that we schedule delivery for Friday 1st August. This would be 37weeks and 6days. We were doing a C-section, as we had an emergency cesarian with Amalia (who failed to progress after induction), and natural birth could be stressful on an already very small and possibly fragile bub.